Prologue -- Birthday suit -- Dynamic dog duo -- Redneck pets -- Book report -- Unidentified walking object -- Snake bit -- Floating log -- Dancing with wolves -- Bumblebees -- Kamikaze pilot -- C is always the best answer -- Big oaf -- Passing the test -- Good morning, Vietnam! -- Deuce and a half -- Guard duty -- Leave it to beavers -- Black market -- Iced tea glass -- The woman of my dreams -- Newlyweds -- God's blessing -- Trasa -- Like father, like son -- Sleepwalking -- Mass murder -- Semiretirement -- Homecoming -- Broken heart -- Faith -- Afterword: Letters to Si from his family.