Introduction: the quest for the special secret sauce -- What you need to know before you start writing. Steal, steal, steal: learning to read like a writer ; Craft your "I": thinking of yourself as a character ; Sex, drugs, and Palestinian statehood: finding a topic ; AMANDA + JIM ; Aboutness: an essay is often about something other than what it's about ; ADAM FINDS HIS PIRATES ; The hole in the donut: writing about the hardest thing ; Tell us about your world in two hundred words: The short answers ; EMMA'S SHORTIES -- Getting it down on the page and then cleaning it up. Shitty first drafts: the importance of allowing yourself to write badly ; Seeing again: revision means re-vision ; Don't try to hook the reader like a trout: the opening lines ; PEYTON'S ANKLE ; Danger! Some moves not to make ; Semicolons are like loaded guns: mechanics matter ; My little bag of writing tricks: some tips -- Conclusion: getting it done.