Introduction: Million-dollar baby -- A glass eye and a British accent -- Roots -- Lou and Dena -- Never young -- "The strongest influence in my life" -- The fifth-grader and the bootlegger -- Another opening, another show -- The ostrich -- The speedwriting secretarial school -- The most forgettable husband; the most notorious friend -- Catastrophe -- "A halo of fear" -- Sunrise -- A godfather of the mafia sort -- Becoming Barbara Walters -- The runaway bride -- The "pushy cookie"-- "It's a girl!" -- A melody played in a penny arcade -- McGee's law -- When love is not enough -- Careful what you wish for -- Failure -- Fidel -- Comeback -- The man she married (but only once) -- The runaway daughter -- The honeymoon and the arms dealer -- Loss -- Diane -- You can't have it all -- The yin and the yang -- The Barbara Walters interview -- Bette Davis and the Dalai Lama -- The View -- Monica -- Trump -- One more time -- The fall -- The end -- Epilogue: The rulebreaker -- Acknowledgments -- Source notes -- Notes.